Strategic Caffeination, Abstinence & Other Self Improvement Hacks

Photo by Candice Picard on Unsplash

I am sitting at my laptop drinking my second cup of black coffee for the day. Shocking I know, a writer drinking coffee, yet for me it kind of is.

My relationship with coffee is tumultuous.

In small measured doses it is extremely helpful – focus, energy and motivation levels all increase – it allows me to sit at my laptop and just work.

In large doses however, coffee is crippling. I have a history of mental illness: long years of dealing with past trauma manifested as anxiety, depression and addiction.

Coffee compounds these issues.

Too much will cause me to have outright panic attacks. Sustained usage will cause my resting anxiety levels to skyrocket, leaving me feeling jittery and short of breath. Small problems balloon as I ruminate upon them. I become manically high, then crash into depression.

So why then am I drinking coffee right now?

In small doses, taken strategically, coffee is a useful productivity tool.

Studies have shown that caffeine can improve productivity and creativity. My personal experimentation has confirmed this fact for me. Not a ground-breaking discovery to say the least, but it’s one that fellow addicts and anxious buddies out there want to exploit safely.

Here is where self-awareness and discipline come into play.

After spending hours in meditation I know myself fairly well. For one, I know that I like self-imposed ‘rules’ – hard lines in the sand that tell me what I can and can’t do.

For example, establishing a morning routine gets me exercising and meditating daily. Completely quitting sugar and porn has changed my life.

Furthermore, I know that I am not good with addictive substances. I am not someone that can easily have a little of something. One drink quickly leads to many. One bite of cake leads to gluttony.

I know that it is far easier for me to say no completely, as a self-imposed rule, than it is to consume in moderation.

Knowing myself well enough enables me to structure my life in a way that leads to a greater level of success.

So now let’s bring it back to the coffee.

In the past I would attempt to minimise my daily consumption. But inevitably, and quickly, that ‘one single shot per day’, quickly jumped to three double shots as well as a diet coke.

I would get anxious, have a break down, and cut right back to one a day again. Rinse and repeat.

So, as with the sugar, porn and alcohol I cut it completely for a while. I was rewarded with significantly reduced anxiety levels and improved belly health (coffee is a laxative after all).

Unfortunately, I now no longer had the benefits that coffee can bring when used appropriately.

It took mentally shifting what coffee (or rather caffeine) actually is. It is a drug. Drugs are used to treat specific conditions or to enhance certain mental states. Drugs are not on their own, good or bad – rather it’s how they are used that makes their impacts good or bad.

So now I strategically use coffee.

On my writing days (Tuesdays and Thursdays) I will drink up to two single shot coffees. No more on those days, and none on the other days.

This is the hard and fast rule that I stick to.

By strategically using coffee, I get all the benefits of caffeine, with little of the consequences that daily use was causing me.

I have a similar system for using Marijuana and another for Valium that ensures that I don’t abuse them, whilst getting the best benefits from their impacts (please let me know if I should write about my strategic use of those as well).

The key here really is self-awareness. The more that I look over my past, the easier it is to see the trends and impacts of coffee upon my mental state. I am also able to determine the best way to make positive changes upon my habits.

How you operate may be similar to me, or it may be totally different. That’s okay, there is no one size fits all with self-improvement. Try my approach and observe its impact. Try another approach and observe some more.

Keep what works and discard the rest.