It’s Not You It’s Me

The fucking arsehole just broke up with me two hours before my shift. And here I was thinking it was all going well. He actually said the words, “It’s not you, it’s me.” Like those sounds actually came out of his stupid mouth.

Arsehole!

Unfortunately, a month later, there was a party. Hosted by the one mutual friend who hadn’t chosen sides, my side that is, and insisted on inviting us both. So of course, I turned my outfit all the way up that night. Heels, perfume, red lipstick, and that lacy choker chain that I knew drove him wild. I planned to find someone I’d never met before, and, well, seduce him.

But it didn’t quite go that way...